By sharing housing, seniors and migrants in Sweden build bridges
| Helsingborg, Sweden
It was when his older Swedish neighbors threw him a high school graduation party that Afghan native Zia Sarwary finally felt a sense of belonging in this picturesque seaside city.
鈥淚t meant everything to me,鈥� says Mr. Sarwary, who at the age of 13 arrived alone in Sweden during the 2015 refugee crisis. 鈥淭hat was the beginning of feeling at home.鈥�
Mr. Sarwary is one of dozens of tenants living in Sa虉llbo, a shared-living project mixing elder Swedes and young adults, some of them from Sweden, others 鈥� like him 鈥� from the Middle East or Afghanistan. The six-story building with 51 apartments helps counter both the loneliness of advanced-age Swedes and the integration difficulties facing migrants who arrived as unaccompanied minors.
Why We Wrote This
A story focused onLiving situations can be difficult for seniors and for immigrants, due to loneliness and separation from society. One Swedish housing project is trying to help both groups by putting them together 鈥� and it seems to be working.
Tenants of Sa虉llbo have found common ground within these colorful walls, which they attribute to the cumulative impact of courtesy, kindness, mutual curiosity, and understanding.
鈥淭he whole goal was to show that even if you are different and even if you are people who would not usually socialize, you would do so if there is a safe environment where you know who is in the house,鈥� says Dragana Curovic, the project manager for Sa虉llbo. 鈥淎fter three years, we can say that it worked.鈥�
鈥淲e can meet in the middle ground鈥�
Had they not moved under the same roof, the older Swedes and young migrants living here would almost certainly not have mingled. Fear and misunderstanding would have been major obstacles. Older Swedes鈥� impressions of young migrants draw heavily on negative press reports linking them to crime.
As for the immigrants, their interactions with Swedes had largely been limited to asylum center officials 鈥� authority figures who聽set the initial tone for the newcomers鈥� experience, but weren鈥檛 focused on building bonds with them.
Sa虉llbo attempts to overcome that by getting tenants engaged with each other. To move in, tenants must agree to socialize at least two hours per week. That can happen in shared kitchens, activity rooms, or cozy living areas. Each floor boasts three common areas, ranging from puzzle and scrapbooking rooms to libraries and film-screening rooms to carpentry workshops. Sun-kissed kitchens are set up for mingling, growing herbs, pickling, and baking. Artwork decorates the hallways.
Intergenerational living projects exist around the world, but the one at Sa虉llbo stands out for its integration of migrants. Young and old concur that the pandemic helped strengthen the bonds that bind them. Younger residents did grocery shopping for the elders, who returned the favor by helping those with low computer skills keep up with their classes online.
Now a logger working night shifts, Mr. Sarwary wishes he had even more time to spend with his older neighbors and feels bad when he needs to cut conversations short to catch his bus. After all, elders are treated with deference in Afghanistan. He believes curiosity feeds residents鈥� capacity to find common ground across cultures and age groups.
鈥淧eople try to understand each other,鈥� he says. 鈥淚 know you have your differences. I have mine. But we can meet in the middle ground and do something together that is good for both of us. There is a positivity in everything. That is the best part.鈥�
鈥淪ometimes you do things that are not correct,鈥� Mr. Sawary continues. 鈥淚nstead of people coming in scolding you, they come in and they鈥檙e like, 鈥極h, you could do it this way.鈥欌�� That attitude manifests itself in small tasks he performs, such as helping an older resident change a lightbulb, and in longer endeavors such as a neighbor teaching him how to drive.
It helps that people understand that he had a tough background and approach him with an open mind to learn about his headline-grabbing, war-torn homeland.
鈥淭hey would always ask instead of just judging. 鈥極K, is this true about your country?鈥欌�� he says. 鈥淓ven now they ask [questions] here in Sa虉llbo. Everywhere else they don鈥檛 even ask. They have this picture in their head about you. ... In Sa虉llbo, what I like is that they are very curious.鈥�
鈥淚 love the young kids鈥�
Jan Gustavsson, a retired provider of security systems, says he like helping young people from Afghanistan and other parts of the world integrate. 鈥淲e can see in other places where no one does anything, there鈥檚 a lot of crime,鈥� he says. 鈥淟ike in Stockholm and Gothenburg, there鈥檚 a lot of problems with them.鈥�
鈥淚 think it will help if these people live together with Swedish people,鈥� he adds. 鈥淭hey learn more about the Swedish customs and traditions. They get to know other people. Their Swedish improves.鈥�
Anki Andersson oversees scrapbooking activities on Tuesdays. Her husband, Kalle, helps fellow seniors do seated workouts. 鈥淪a虉llbo is the perfect place if you are mobile and seeking to socialize,鈥� says Ms. Andersson. 鈥淧eople here are so alike in a way. It is hard to explain. We click together very well, both the older and young residents.鈥�
鈥淭hey were very helpful during the pandemic, but also before and after,鈥� she says of the young people. 鈥淚f we have something we need to do or heavy things to carry, they give as a hand. We are a big family.鈥�
Retired schoolteacher Gunilla Olsson feels especially at home. She is still touched that one of the girls studying to become a doctor brought her chocolate. It was a gesture of thanks to her for always saying good night as she passed the study on her way to her apartment every night.
鈥淚 love the young kids,鈥� says Ms. Olsson 鈥淚t鈥檚 so good to have them around with their smiles. It is so good for old people to be around young people.鈥�
鈥淚 love the different ages and cultures,鈥� concurs Ritva Gustafsson, a retired Swedish language teacher. 鈥淚 love it because they are still looking forward to something. We have things behind us so we can bring them something. And they can bring us something. It is very exciting to share the experiences of their home countries.鈥�
Conversations can turn political and ethical, she notes. But even amid differences of opinion, they do not turn as heated as they might at a family dinner table. 鈥淲hen people are discussing values, when something happens, they put forward what they think and why they think it,鈥� she says. 鈥淭here is respect.鈥�
The biggest trigger for low-level shared living conflict? 鈥淔luff,鈥� says Sonja H氓kansson, who oversees the building. 鈥淟aundry fluff and dishes.鈥�
The project 鈥渉as worked better than I thought it would,鈥� she says. 鈥淗aving so many different personalities and different ages from other cultures, I thought that was going to be a bigger issue. But people find their similarities.鈥�
鈥淲e are interlinked鈥�
Safety is central to the smooth functioning of the building. Guests are allowed 鈥� and can even stay overnight in a room set aside for visitors 鈥� but must always be accompanied by their host. The night lights are always on. Each floor has its own cheerful color scheme to make it easier for aging people to find their bearings.
But the real safety comes from knowing each other and watching out for each other. Neighbors are quick to notice when someone is not around or has fallen ill. 鈥淵ou can always knock on someone鈥檚 door,鈥� says Ms. Gustafsson.
Amel Ben Jmaj, a biotech student from Tunisia, is one of the newest tenants and already loves the place. She recently moved in to join her fianc茅, a construction worker, and is awaiting her Swedish residency permit.
鈥淚t is a completely different way of living,鈥� she says, finishing up the dishes as she makes plans to make baklava for an upcoming party. 鈥淲e are interlinked. We play puzzles together, watch films, and throw parties. It鈥檚 heaven.鈥�
Editor鈥檚 note: Dates on some photographs have been corrected to read 鈥�2023.鈥澛�
