A grandfather鈥檚 welcome to the neighborhood kids
When I was 6, I found independence in journeys to my grandfather鈥檚 house, two blocks away. I would hop on my bike and head over for a mini Horizon chocolate milk.
My brothers and I called him Dad-dad, and so did our friends. We knew we could stop by anytime for a treat, or for tea and cookies at 4 p.m. An accomplished woodworker, he finished an eave in his attic, intuiting correctly that it was a perfect space for forts.
鈥淲e knew we had a haven there,鈥� said my brother Sam. 鈥淎nd a lot of goodies.鈥�
Sam and a friend, Olivia, said nearly identical things when I asked about memories of neighborliness in Silver Spring, Maryland: 鈥淚 was always being sent to a neighbor鈥檚 to borrow ingredients鈥� and 鈥渢here was not a day that we were not outside.鈥�
I cherish these memories but what I cherish most is my grandfather鈥檚 curiosity and openness, and his joy to see children knock at the door, whether they were his grandkids or not. In the years since, friends have told me they would stop by Dad-dad鈥檚 even without me.
It鈥檚 explained by both privilege and a different era that my brothers and our friends were free to play tag across an entire block鈥檚 worth of yards, or knock on doors without thinking twice. And while that environment of trust isn鈥檛 one the majority of Americans enjoy, it is one many are trying to cultivate.
Michael Dolan, author of a book on porches, invited me not only onto his porch, but also into his living room to discuss my story on porch culture. I had a very different experience door-knocking near my old neighborhood, where the few people who did answer the door were standoffish and curt. No one is obligated to talk to a reporter, but it is strange to live in a time where we regard anyone on our front step with suspicion.
As Mr. Dolan explained to me, a culture of neighborliness is inseparable from one where people feel safe. My grandfather had a wide-open heart for the humanity in everyone, and that made kids and adults feel comfortable with him. That was his strength, and I鈥檓 starting to think it鈥檚 also the key to neighborliness.
