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What Miami Dolphins offensive tackle Richie Incognito did to fellow offensive lineman Jonathan Martin 鈥� use a racial slur, disparage his mother 鈥� quickly made him either the most hated hazer in sports or the epitome of a dying breed, the unapologetic man鈥檚 man.

In the days since Martin left the Dolphins鈥� training complex in disgust over what he said was continuous and over-the-top hazing by Incognito and others, America has found itself in a debate over the definition of modern manhood, pitting the primacy of old warrior codes against evolving social expectations around bullying and cruel joshing.

As the NFL probes the Dolphins鈥� locker room culture and, more broadly, the league鈥檚 views on hazing, the incident has reverberated across the country, at a time when basketball, European soccer, and now American football have become embroiled in controversies around cultural, racial, and gender sensitivities.

鈥淭here will be some who say [the uproar over Incognito鈥檚 actions] is overpolicing of normal rambunctious masculinity, and some percentage, probably a majority, who鈥檒l say, 鈥極h, [hazing] is perfectly OK, but this guy goes too far,鈥� and a third that鈥檒l say this story blows the lid off a culture of cruelty that has no place in what is, let鈥檚 be honest, the entertainment industry,鈥� says Michael Kimmel, the author of 鈥淎ngry White Men鈥� and a sociologist at Stony Brook University in New York.

鈥淎t the same time,鈥� he says, 鈥渢here鈥檚 this constant feeling that we鈥檙e making men softer, the feminization of sport 鈥� 鈥榃hen men were men, we didn鈥檛 care about such things as teeth.鈥� 鈥�

According to transcripts of voicemails provided by Martin鈥檚 agent, Incognito last April called Martin by a racist phrase and ended his rant with, 鈥溾�� you鈥檙e a rookie. I鈥檒l kill you.鈥� Incognito is suspended indefinitely from the team, and it鈥檚 unclear whether either player will ever block a quarterback鈥檚 blindside again.

Martin鈥檚 agent says verbal and physical abuse continued for 18 months until Martin walked away from the team last week and sought psychological help.

Many Americans called Martin a hero for calling out the NFL over Incognito鈥檚 behavior and, Martin鈥檚 agent says, the conduct of some other players. In Martin鈥檚 view, experts say, team-building initiation traditions had morphed into team-breaking abuse, meaning that he could no longer trust his own teammates to stand up for him on the gridiron.

鈥淸E]specially in the NFL, being a man 鈥� a man's man, a real man, a manly man 鈥� all too often means projecting an air of invincibility, a willingness to absorb pain at all costs, an expectation that even the most vicious insults can do no harm,鈥� writes espnW鈥檚 Kate Fagan. 鈥淰ulnerability is seen as weakness.鈥�

She adds that until America has a real debate about the nature of manhood in the wake of the scandal, 鈥渢oo few people will see and appreciate the real men in our midst, the ones who refuse to perpetuate this toxic brand of masculinity.鈥�

But many have rushed to Incognito鈥檚 defense, blaming Martin for failing to resolve the matter inside the locker room, and for not just punching back twice as hard at Incognito to assert dominance.

鈥淚f Incognito did offend him racially, that's something you have to handle as a man!鈥� one anonymous NFL-er told Sport Illustrated鈥檚 Jim Martin.

In the same vein, the push to root out hazing in the NFL comes up against a broader complaint about what some have called the 鈥渨ussification鈥� of American society, to the point where, according to books like Helen Smith鈥檚 鈥淢en on Strike,鈥� men are increasingly boycotting college and relationships because America has become 鈥渁nti-male.鈥�

Brian Phillips in the online magazine Grantland takes a different view, writing that football has become 鈥渢he major theater of American masculine crackup.鈥�

He adds: 鈥淚t's as if we're a nation of gentle accountants and customer-service reps who've retained this one venue where we can air-guitar the berserk discourse of a warrior race. We're Klingons, but only on Sundays.鈥�

Others still see complexities in what, on the surface, appears to be an obvious act of a team leader going way too far in bullying a rookie. Dolphins quarterback Ryan Tannehill added nuance to the story on Wednesday when he said Incognito saw Martin as a 鈥渓ittle brother鈥� whom he looked out for.

鈥淲e鈥檙e all kind of jumping to conclusions and I鈥檓 guilty of doing the same thing,鈥� former New York Jets QB Boomer Esiason said on his WFAN radio show on Thursday.

鈥淣obody is approving of being a bully, nobody is saying that鈥檚 OK, nobody is saying the language in which Richie Incognito was talking to Jonathan Martin is OK,鈥� he said. 鈥淏ut again, I have to understand the context in which those conversations took place and the conversations between the two men for the past 18 months.鈥�

Either way, the Incognito incident now looms as a major turning point for the NFL and its locker room culture.

鈥淎n event like this is definitely going to change the organizational policies of the NFL,鈥� says Jonathan Casper, a sports management expert at North Carolina State University in Raleigh.

The upshot of Martin鈥檚 decision to step outside the team to complain about his treatment may turn into a 鈥渕orning after鈥� moment, where Americans will one day look back and be shocked that such behavior was ever tolerated, or that some men were so bluntly defined as merely muscle and meanness, says聽Mr. Kimmel at Stony Brook.

Some sports culture experts also suggest that, while Incognito鈥檚 behavior may have been particularly cruel, some NFL coaches, players, and executives looked the other way because the big offensive lineman performed on the field and riled up the locker room, even as he racked up a rap sheet of misconduct.

鈥淎n outsider might say, well, look at [Incognito鈥檚] track record, he should have been stopped at Ohio State,鈥� says Adam Naylor, a sports psychology professor at Boston University. 鈥淏ut that requires a whole system to not value the pseudo-toughness that he displays.鈥�