海角大神

I saw Disney-Pixar鈥檚 "Brave" the day it debuted in theaters, and I鈥檓 glad that Merida is a different kind of princess 鈥� one who can be read as a critique of both the trope that princesses are passive and the trend to tell their stories as romances.

But I also have some mixed feelings. For example:

• The film鈥檚 marketing, which essentially ignores that "Brave" is a tale of a mother-daughter relationship (presumably for fear that such a story wouldn鈥檛 be a box office draw), is insulting.

• The storyline itself features such unappealing would-be suitors that Merida鈥檚 disinterest in romance is undercut: What if the three young men who must vie for her hand were more like Prince Charmings than doofuses?

• Finally, having听studied girl power media听for several years, it bothers me that Merida is presented as isolated, an anomalous female, without a community of female peers her own age. Can鈥檛 a girl who is supposed to be strong not be a loner?

With all that in mind, since the release of "Brave," I鈥檝e been reading reviews and commentaries of the film with interest. There are two strands of criticism that I would like to address: 1) that the film is unoriginal, and 2) that Merida is a brat.

Is听"Brave" an unoriginal film?

When Joanna Weiss of听the听Boston Globe听and I听"Brave," she mentioned that a lot of early reviews complained the film was unoriginal 鈥� 鈥漥ust another princess movie,鈥� she said. Reviewers were complaining that unlike other Pixar films, "Brave" didn鈥檛 feature a fully fabricated, fantastically unexpected world; it seemed to be treading old ground.

For example, Todd McCarthy听that "Brave" is 鈥渇amiliar鈥� and treads 鈥渟tartlingly well-worn territory.鈥� He also complains that it is 鈥渓aden with standard-issue fairy tale and familiar girl-empowerment tropes.鈥� But is it, really? It鈥檚 a story about a mother-daughter relationship. How is this 鈥渇amiliar鈥� and 鈥渨ell-worn?鈥� He and听听complain that听Brave听is too Disney and not enough Pixar. In reading reviews like these, I sensed the reviewers just couldn鈥檛 get past the fact that "Brave" is about a princess, rather than something as unexpected as talking cars or talking toys or talking fish.

Ask any girl who鈥檚 been raised on princess films, and she鈥檒l tell you that Merida is different, and very unlike her Disney Princess peers. As far as the narrative goes, what does Merida have in common with Disney Princesses, exactly? The fact that she鈥檚 a princess who has utterly fantastic hair. That鈥檚 about it.

(Even the witch in "Brave" seems perfectly nice. Unlike Disney鈥檚 approach, there鈥檚 no vilification of old ladies in Pixar鈥檚 film, which is refreshing.)

Other than that, while watching "Brave," I was amused to notice how closely the film follows Pixar鈥檚 formula for its protagonists:

• The protagonist (e.g., Woody, Lightning McQueen, Marlin) makes some bad decisions, portrayed in ways that make them seem not entirely likable. (Because of his ego and jealousy, Woody is a jerk to Buzz; Lightning is self-centered, smugly superior, and judgmental of others; Marlin is a smothering, over-protective parent.)

• The protagonist does something that causes harm or potential harm to someone else. (Woody pushes Buzz out a window; Lightning coerces Mack into driving overnight; Marlin embarrasses Nemo in front of peers so badly that Nemo takes a risk and is captured by a diver.)

• Said protagonist has unexpected experiences, a journey beyond his comfort zone. (Woody has to leave Andy鈥檚 house to save Buzz, and gets to know him better; Lightning, separated from Mack, has an unexpected several-day detour through Radiator Springs, and actually gets to know its citizens; Marlin travels across the ocean to find his son, confronting his worst fears.)

• As a result of these experiences, the protagonist changes. (Woody becomes less egotistical and ultimately makes friends with Buzz; Lightning becomes less egotistical and ultimately makes friends with the citizens of Radiator Springs; Marlin听calms down and becomes a better parent.)

Merida goes through a similar journey. She begins as a self-absorbed teenager who wants to avoid the responsibilities of being a princess. After a fight with her mother, she finds herself someplace new and strange. Merida makes a bad decision that turns her mother into a bear. While trying to save her mother from this predicament, Merida then spends an awful lot of time insisting that it鈥檚听not her fault.

Finally, however, Merida changes, developing a better understanding of her mother and growing as a person. She realizes it听is听her fault, and by the movie鈥檚 conclusion, she has incorporated some of her mother鈥檚 statements into her own worldview, such as 鈥淟egends are lessons. They ring with truth,鈥� and 鈥淗ow do you know you don鈥檛 like it if you won鈥檛 try it?鈥� (At this, a young child seated behind me and my son in the theater marveled, 鈥淪he鈥檚 acting like her mother!鈥�)

So if the film seems familiar to reviewers, I don鈥檛 think it鈥檚 because it鈥檚 a Disney princess story.听Merida is so different from the other Disney Princesses.听Do Cinderella, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, or Ariel have journeys in which they learn something about themselves and change? No. Their problems are solved by others. What about Belle? No. She longs for 鈥渁dventure in the great wide somewhere,鈥� but ultimately she is reduced to a catalyst of change for someone else 鈥� the Beast.

I really think that "Brave" feels familiar to many viewers because it鈥檚 telling the same type of story Pixar has been trading in for years.听And so, as I听, it seems a little sexist for reviewers to place the blame for the film鈥檚 familiar feeling on the fact that Merida is a听princess.

Is Merida a brat?

Another strand of conversation that has caught my eye is the debate over whether Merida is more bratty than brave. After all, she鈥檚 sassy and outspoken and argues openly with her mother. A reviewer at SFGate.com expresses听听that 鈥渢he movie may tilt the balance too far in Mom鈥檚 direction, so that the film鈥檚 ostensible heroine ceases to seem adorably spunky and becomes more like an awful brat.鈥�

Indeed, in some audience members鈥� opinions, this seems to be the case. One blogger that the movie 鈥渟eems to accept and perhaps even glorify the defiance of the diva, the 鈥榗oolness鈥� of being a brat, and the idea that insolence is synonymous with independence. When did respect for one鈥檚 parents, a gentle spirit, and a longing for a loving partnership involving mutual sacrifice become sexist and outdated?鈥� Another听, 鈥淚 worry that our culture perpetuates a sort of entitled-brat attitude in girls these days: that our daughters deserve to get what they want, when they want it simply because they are girls. And nobody can tell girls these days what to do or what to want. They鈥檙e in charge.鈥�

In all of this, I haven鈥檛 seen anyone acknowledge the reality of teenagers鈥� relationships with their parents. As the book 听explains, studies indicate that 96 percent of teenagers lie to their parents, often about really big issues. Which teens lie the least? Those whose parents consistently enforce rules while being the most warm and having the most conversations with their children. They explain why rules exist but are supportive of their children鈥檚 autonomy and freedom.

This, perhaps, can be understood as Elinor鈥檚 big parenting mistake: She dictates things to Merida without really explaining them to her, and so it seems to Merida that her mother does not support her freedom.

Yet ironically, Merida鈥檚 protestations and efforts to change her mother鈥檚 mind are not signs of a bad mother-daughter relationship. Studies also show that the teens who argue more openly with their parents are the teens who are the most honest. According to听Nurture Shock, one study showed that families with less deception had 鈥渁 much higher ratio of arguing/complaining. Arguing was good鈥揳rguing was honesty.鈥� However, 鈥淭he parents didn鈥檛 necessarily realize this. The arguing stressed them out.鈥�

Meanwhile,听another study of mother-daughter arguments summarized in听Nurture Shock found that while听nearly half of mothers felt arguments with their daughters were bad for their relationships, less than a quarter of daughters felt the same way. For daughters, what was most important was how these arguments ended. The daughters needed to feel heard by their mothers, and over time, they needed to win some arguments and get small concessions from others. But they did not need to win every battle; they mainly needed to feel heard. (As Merida says to her mother, 鈥淛ust listen to me!鈥�)

In other words, the fact that Merida makes her disagreements clear to her mother does not make her a brat. As unpleasant as this may be for parents to consider, Merida鈥檚 argumentative nature may actually be a sign of respect and a mother-daughter relationship that is fundamentally sound. That鈥檚 important to keep in mind. When Merida and her mother begin to really consider one another鈥檚 perspectives, both parties grow as individuals, and their relationship becomes stronger.听For parents worried that Merida is a 鈥渂rat鈥� who is setting a poor example for their children, these facts could provide useful talking points for the entire family.

海角大神 has assembled a diverse group of the best family and parenting bloggers out there. Our contributing and guest bloggers are not employed or directed by the Monitor, and the views expressed are the bloggers' own, as is responsibility for the content of their blogs. Rebecca Hains blogs at听