海角大神

I won鈥檛 bore you with a long list of things in this world that I consider 鈥渞ight鈥� and that I consider 鈥渨rong.鈥�

It鈥檚 simple enough to say that everyone has a slightly different list and that my own sense of 鈥渞ight鈥� and 鈥渨rong鈥� isn鈥檛 too far away from what you might call 鈥渘ormal.鈥�

For me, as for a lot of people, having this internal list of 鈥渞ight鈥� and 鈥渨rong鈥� puts a聽lot聽of things in life into a grey area. Some aspects of something are 鈥渞ight,鈥� while other aspects are 鈥渨rong,鈥� so we鈥檙e stuck trying to figure out the right choice when it comes to that grey area.

For example, let鈥檚 say your wife finds a receipt for a gift that you bought for her. She doesn鈥檛 know precisely what it is, but she鈥檚 suspicious and she asks you about it. You want to maintain a surprise for her, but is it the right thing to tell her a little white lie about it?聽

You can argue all day about it, but there is no real 鈥渞ight鈥� answer here because it depends on too many personal factors about you, your wife, and your marriage.

What about when you鈥檙e at a store and you see an item for $19.99 that鈥檚 made in a sweatshop in southeast Asia versus an item for $29.99 that鈥檚 made in the United States?

You鈥檙e witnessing an internal battle between frugality and your role as a consumer in a global economy, where your buying power gets to help make decisions about whether to import goods from those situations. Which do you choose?

Again, you can argue all day long about these kinds of situations, but it comes down to each person having a somewhat different set of values.

So, why am I writing about this?

People often feel guilty when they make a choice or two that goes against that internal moral code.They鈥檒l buy something that鈥檚 very inexpensive but cheaply made and feel bad when it doesn鈥檛 work or they see the conditions that item was made in. They鈥檒l tell a little white lie to hide a surprise, but then feel bad about it.

Money is filled with these kinds of little decisions and little mistakes and little guilts.聽We鈥檙e human. We can鈥檛 help but make the wrong decision sometimes.

I do it all the time, and I聽try not to feel guilty about it.聽Instead, I know from that guilt that I need to do a bit more thinking about what鈥檚 right and what鈥檚 wrong, because either my internal sense is off or I鈥檓 making poor decisions based on it.

When you feel guilty about a money mistake you made,聽don鈥檛 beat yourself up over it.聽Instead, try to figure out聽why聽you feel guilty, then strive to fix that in the future.

For example, it鈥檚 better for me to just hide gifts for my wife very, very carefully than to have to tell her a falsehood. If she finds the receipt, I鈥檒l just tell her it鈥檚 for a surprise gift and she should be patient.

If I鈥檓 in a store and I鈥檓 aware of the relative conditions under which each item is made, I鈥檒l lean strongly toward the one that鈥檚 made ethically. I view the cost difference as something I can afford. It鈥檚 also why I tend to buy food locally if I can.

I鈥檝e thought about these situations and many others like it that have to do with money and internal morality. I鈥檝e made mistakes with each one and it鈥檚 made me think about what I really believe. I don鈥檛 hate myself or beat myself up over the missteps 鈥� I just view them as a clue towards acting better in the future.

It鈥檚 easy, in this world full of moral greyness, to make mistakes sometimes. The person who comes out on top isn鈥檛 the person who wallows in guilt, but the person who figures out a better path for the next time such decisions come up.

The post聽聽appeared first on聽.