海角大神

After many years of wearing my favorite denim long-sleeved shirt, I noticed a hole in the elbow. Ah, darn, I mutter to myself. Well, holes be darned, I love this shirt. I鈥檓 sure no one will notice.聽

鈥淵ou鈥檝e got a hole in your elbow,鈥� my husband says the second he sees me. 鈥淵ou better put a patch or something on it, or it鈥檚 going to get worse.鈥� I kindly thank him for his advice 鈥� and promptly proceed to ignore it. It鈥檚 just a tiny hole 鈥� what鈥檚 the worst that can happen?

I continue to get ready for my day. I contemplate dusting off the rarely used makeup bag to find some mascara and decide it鈥檚 a bit too much work for a day filled with Zoom meetings. I reach for something at the bottom of my closet. Rip. Was that ... I鈥檓 sure it鈥檚 fine. I stand up and look for something at the top of my closet. Riiiip. Um. I reach for the closet door and slide it shut. Riiiiippp. What鈥檚 that breeze? Across the room, my husband starts laughing. I look down at my shirt and see paper-thin scraps of fabric flapping around my arms. It took exactly five minutes for his advice to turn prophetic. 鈥淣ow you look like a scarecrow,鈥� my husband smiles.

There wasn鈥檛 anything special about the day I bought my 鈥渟carecrow shirt.鈥� Chambray shirts were all the rage a few years back, and I鈥檇 been contemplating adding one to my wardrobe. One day we were meandering through an outlet shopping center and wandered into a Levi鈥檚 store. The shirt was on sale, a size too big, but would do just fine.聽

It was one of those shirts that got more comfortable the more it was worn, slowly becoming soft as butter against my skin. The pale blue color made for an excellent lightweight jacket in the summer. In the fall, I loved that I could throw on a puffy vest and embrace the brisk autumn air with a maple latte. Throughout the cold winters, I would button it all the way up, pair it with some wool socks, and curl up with a book under a cozy blanket. I鈥檇 still find myself drawn to the simple shirt come spring, versatile enough to get me through those rainy New England months to eventually welcome the daffodils. 聽

There were warning signs that it was on its last legs, or arms. Some of the buttons were getting a bit loose. And there were those faint splatters of meals enjoyed that hadn鈥檛 quite come out in the wash. People weren鈥檛 really wearing this style anymore. Perhaps an updated look was in order? But no. This shirt had seen a lot with me: the ups and downs of dating, saying my vows, the birth of my first child. I intended to stay loyal, even as the fabric wore away and each time I wore it felt like it might be my last.聽

There are few material items in life that gain my loyalty. We鈥檙e constantly bombarded with advertisements and calls to action, begging us to try the latest and greatest thing. The so-called fast-fashion industry rushes to produce clothes that fit the latest fad, but in a week those styles are yesterday鈥檚 news. Each season has a new hit song, a color of the year, trending TikToks, or viral memes. But there鈥檚 something sweet about reaching for what you know, holding tight to that thing you鈥檙e just drawn to, long past when logic tells you it might be time to let go. It鈥檚 comforting to enjoy these small pleasures and embrace them for the small gift of stability that they are. It may seem like it鈥檚 just an item, a piece of clothing, a worn-out shirt. But it also represents a life well lived and the joy of being in your element.

As I inspected my blown-out elbows, I had to laugh out loud. I did look like a scarecrow, with my small frame hanging with tattered rags.聽

鈥淚s it time to let that one go?鈥� my husband asked.聽

I paused for a moment, then smiled. I grabbed a pair of scissors and cut the paper-thin fabric right above the rips. Gently, I folded the material past my elbows. Admiring my handiwork, I turned toward my husband to show him my new, short-sleeved shirt.聽

Not yet.