海角大神

In the morning, before getting up, I write this to-do list in a small notebook:听

1. Go to the bank.

2. Get a nice haircut.

3. Pick up my final, signed academic statement from my college.

4. Submit the packet of poems.

I think, 鈥淭hat鈥檚 enough for one day,鈥� and I roll out of bed.

Up until a few years ago, I didn鈥檛 aim to be anywhere. And in order to be nowhere, one does not need a to-do list as a guide. Simply existing had been enough for me. Focusing only on the most pressing matter in front of me was enough. Let the next urgent moment think for me.听

My mama had tried to teach me about planning my day ever since I was 10. But I never practiced it until I was 25 and done with college. That鈥檚 when I awoke to the fact that I didn鈥檛 want to waste any more time. I live in Nigeria, where life and success can be difficult. There seem to be many avenues to failure here.

My mom told me that 鈥渁 to-do list is like a mental compass that you use to navigate the ocean of junk inside your head.鈥澨�

Here鈥檚 one of my mom鈥檚 typical to-do lists:

1. Take the kids to the tailor shop.

2. Call Mama X for my products.

3. Remind Joseph to call the mechanic.

Every day she writes a list. I never understood why she had to write down a list that consists of items you can easily hold in your mind. 鈥淵our to-do list is like your second mind,鈥� she told my younger self. 鈥淎nd you鈥檙e going to need a second mind sometimes in your life.鈥�

I didn鈥檛 understand what she meant by 鈥渁 second mind鈥� until I seemed to lose my first mind trying to navigate my everyday life. What do you call waking up and trudging around each day for weeks and months like a zombie, achieving nothing?听

I grew up seeing my mother firmly in charge of her day. She knew 鈥� and still knows 鈥� where she needed to be at every moment, in every major and minor detail. She鈥檚 always in motion and always on time. And if she ever feels lost or overwhelmed, she consults her second mind. It鈥檚 contained in a school exercise book she keeps in the bag she carries with her everywhere she goes.

My mom may not be good at singing, acting, or sports. But she is excellent at business, bookkeeping, and planning. Planning, in fact, is at the top of her list.

鈥淧lan for tomorrow,鈥� was the tagline of a commercial I saw every evening on the local news growing up. It鈥檚 my mom鈥檚 headline, her bulletin: plan, plan, plan.

Sometimes, it seems as though it鈥檚 July in my mind 鈥� the rainy season here. Inside my head, it won鈥檛 stop raining torrents of confused and distracting thoughts that overflow my mental gutters and lead nowhere. I need a second mind 鈥� now!

Memories from childhood endure, especially memories of things your mama told you when you were little. Perhaps you were a baby giggling in the crib, or a young child walking with your mom to the local market, kicking up the dust mindlessly. The young me resisted my mother鈥檚 advice. But today, right at the bottom of my daily to-do list, I write: Make a new list.听

My mom may be wrong about a thousand things, but she鈥檚 got this thing right. And now, finally, like a hungry fish, I鈥檝e eagerly swallowed her advice 鈥� hook, line, and sinker.听

As I sit in the barbershop awaiting my nice haircut, a colleague asks me, 鈥淲hat鈥檚 next?鈥�

鈥淧ick up my final clearance form from college,鈥� I say. 鈥淭hen submit my packet of poems, then go to bed.鈥�

鈥淵ou鈥檝e got it figured out like a granny,鈥� he teases.

鈥淣o,鈥� I say, 鈥渓ike my mother.鈥�

In 2020, I learned the value of self-discipline. In 2021, I learned consistency. And last year, full of promise and hope, I began to practice what my mother finally succeeded in teaching me for so many years: I awake every morning, my mind renewed. I stride confidently into a chaotic society 鈥� with my second mind secure in my breast pocket.