海角大神

My 8-year-old daughter cornered me in the kitchen. 鈥淒addy, I want a 谤补迟.鈥�

A rat. I saw beady-eyed, naked-tailed rodents the size of small dogs racing along subway tracks in my mind. She wanted one of those in our house?

鈥淣o, Daddy, a pet 谤补迟.鈥�

What had started about a year earlier as a strange fancy had become a serious pursuit. Alison persisted with reasonable, logical arguments about how she would take care of the rat herself, how she would learn responsibility doing so, and how she would even pay for the rat鈥檚 upkeep with her own money. No whining, no tantrum. She laid out a sober and convincing case.

I wanted to say 鈥渘o鈥� and be done with it. I say 鈥渘o鈥� habitually. Sometimes, because it鈥檚 obvious: 鈥淣o, we can鈥檛 go to Disney World after dinner.鈥� Or, 鈥淣o, you may not wear your muddy boots to bed.鈥� Other times, I say it out of convenience: 鈥淣o, we鈥檙e not stopping at the toy store on the way to school.鈥� Other times, it鈥檚 from weariness: 鈥淣o, we can鈥檛 make a robot this evening.鈥�

I didn鈥檛 want a rat, yet that didn鈥檛 seem the right response for this situation, given the way Alison had so maturely made her case.

So I gave her the classic parent stall. 鈥淟et me talk to your mother about it.鈥�

That evening when my wife and I finally had a quiet moment alone after putting the kids to bed, I broached the subject with her. 鈥淎 rat?!鈥� she said. 鈥淎re you crazy?鈥�

I explained that Alison had impressed me with the case she had made and the reasonable way she had presented it. I didn鈥檛 want to dismiss her effort; I wanted to encourage her maturity. 鈥淢aybe we could come up with a creative response,鈥� I suggested.

鈥淪uch as?鈥�

鈥淚 don鈥檛 know. That鈥檚 why I鈥檓 asking you.鈥�

My wife didn鈥檛 let me down. She came up with the idea that Alison could demonstrate her willingness and responsibility by researching some basic questions we had about rats: How much do they cost? What care do they need? Do they smell?

The task 鈥� or the answers she found 鈥� might discourage her and we could move on to traditional pets, such as goldfish.

Alison would not be deterred. She searched out the answers and jotted diligent notes. She learned what sort of cage best suits rats, what types of food they can (and can鈥檛) eat, what sort of litter is bad for them. She learned that two rats are better than one 鈥� they鈥檙e social creatures.

By that point, I couldn鈥檛 say no. Alison had proved herself capable. If she continued to do so, caring for the rats and paying for their upkeep, she would learn the responsibility we wanted her to practice. My wife agreed, provided I was the one willing to oversee the rats鈥� upkeep. She was all for nurturing Alison鈥檚 maturity but wanted nothing to do with the rodents.

Alison and I called several pet stores, looking for baby rats ready for adoption. (It鈥檚 best to buy them as babies, Alison learned, but they鈥檙e not ready to take home before they鈥檙e 6 weeks old.) One store had just received a litter that would be ready in a week. Alison was beside herself with excitement 鈥� her yearlong dream was only a week away from being fulfilled.

That Sunday afternoon, I drove Alison and her 6-year-old brother, Brendan, to the pet store. A clerk in a blue shirt unlocked the door to a private room where the baby rats were kept in a large cage. The soft, furry critters tumbled over one another like a litter of tiny puppies. I must admit, they were cuter than I鈥檇 expected. They peered at us with inquiring eyes. I hardly noticed their tails.

Alison immediately picked out a cuddly little fellow with soft brown and white fur and named her Snickers. Brendan chose a rambunctious rat with darker markings he dubbed Milk Dude. While I paid at the cash register, the clerk packed the children鈥檚 new pets into small cardboard boxes.

Alison and Brendan cradled the boxes back to the minivan, beaming. There are moments as parents when we want to high-five ourselves for making a good decision or doing something right with our kids. This was one of those for me. Instead of saying 鈥渘o鈥� to what I didn鈥檛 want, I had said 鈥測es鈥� to this. I had that Christmas-morning satisfaction of feeling the thrill of my children鈥檚 delight. I smiled to myself.

Alison settled into her seat, a huge smile still on her face. 鈥淚 can鈥檛 believe I have a rat of my own after a year of begging!鈥�

鈥淚t wasn鈥檛 your begging,鈥� I told her. 鈥淵ou made a reasonable, mature case for getting a rat. We wanted to reward that.鈥�

鈥淒ad?鈥� Brendan immediately piped up. 鈥淐an I get a pet lion?鈥�

He quickly laid out five reasons why a lion would make a good pet.

I may have learned something about flexibility with the rats, but I had not lost my ability to reason. 鈥淣o.鈥�