Ted Cruz, standup comic? Check out his impressions.
| Milford, N.H.
Ted Cruz opens his event in Milford, N.H., with a bang.
鈥淔or the record, Tom Brady was framed!鈥� the Texas senator declares to cheers for the New England Patriots quarterback, who had a little trouble last year with deflated footballs. 鈥淚鈥檓 not willing to pander on much, but Tom Brady was framed, and I have it on good authority that Hillary Clinton was responsible.鈥�
More cheers and applause. 鈥淲hy else do you think she destroyed her e-mails?鈥�
Ba-da-boom. In one pithy joke, Senator Cruz manages both to pander and take a dig at the Democratic frontrunner, and the crowd at the Pasta Loft loves it.
Inside the Beltway, Cruz may be one of official Washington鈥檚 least favorite Republicans 鈥� on both sides of the aisle. It was Cruz, for example, who prodded his fellow legislators toward the government shutdown of 2013, in a quixotic effort to defund Obamacare. In the Senate, he has few friends. But out on the campaign trail, Cruz is rather well-liked 鈥� at least among Republican voters.
Two recent polls, in fact, show him to be the most popular candidate of the entire GOP presidential field. Gallup has Cruz at ; ABC News/Washington Post has him rising .
Maybe it鈥檚 because Cruz can be entertaining. He tells jokes, he does impressions, he plays off voters鈥� questions. He was, after all, once an aspiring actor. Last June, he 鈥渁uditioned鈥� for 鈥淭he Simpsons,鈥� doing an excellent Montgomery Burns, Ned Flanders, and even Lisa and Homer Simpson. Last November, in an impressive performance, Cruz voiced all the parts of a scene from in New Hampshire.
The core of Cruz鈥檚 campaign message centers on his deep conservatism, his religious faith, and near-apocalyptic warnings about the future of the country. But he leavens his stump speech with bits of humor. Democrats would surely find some of it distasteful if they attended his events, but they鈥檙e not his audience. And besides, political correctness is out 鈥� as with the joke he tells at every stop about a Texas farmer.
鈥淵ou know, I鈥檓 reminded of a few years ago, I was out in West Texas, and I asked folks there, I said, 鈥榃hat鈥檚 the difference between regulators and聽 locusts?鈥� 鈥� Cruz begins.
鈥淭hey said, 鈥榃ell, the thing is, you can鈥檛 use pesticide on the regulators.鈥� And this old West Texas farmer, he leaned back and said, 鈥榊ou wanna bet?鈥� 鈥� Cruz finishes, adding a Texas drawl to the farmer鈥檚 voice.
At another point, he invokes the memory and Boston accent of President Kennedy, promising to defend the Constitution 鈥渨ith vigah!鈥� Later, the Kennedy accent comes back with the recitation of this , borrowed from George Bernard Shaw: 鈥淪ome men see things as they ahhh, and ask why. I dream things that nevah were, and ask, why not?鈥澛�
Cruz crosses the line, in Democrats鈥� view, when he asserts that 鈥淛FK would be a Republican today,鈥� saying that Kennedy campaigned on tax cuts, limiting government, and defeating the Soviet communists. 鈥淗e would be tarred and feathered by the modern Democratic Party,鈥� Cruz says. In a, Kennedy鈥檚 grandson calls the notion 鈥渁bsurd.鈥澛�
But no matter. Cruz is not one to shy away from provocation. And as a Princeton debate champion and Harvard-trained lawyer, he deploys words with the precision of a surgeon and the quickness of a stand-up comedian. When a woman at an event Monday in Washington, N.H., asks the senator about paid family leave, revealing that she has four young children 鈥� three girls, then a boy 鈥� Cruz goes for a light touch.
鈥淥h, that poor boy!鈥� he laughs. 鈥淗e is doomed. I am the baby brother with two older sisters, so I understand exactly. It will toughen him up.鈥�
Cruz鈥檚 answer to the woman鈥檚 question 鈥� that 鈥渇ree stuff鈥� from the government isn鈥檛 the answer 鈥� doesn鈥檛 satisfy her, according to . But again, no matter. Others give Cruz points for empathy, as he acknowledges the challenge of juggling work and family.
Cruz also reminds his audiences of the old joke that 鈥減olitics is Hollywood for ugly people,鈥� earning the senator a laugh as if they鈥檙e hearing it for the first time. 鈥淢y wife says I resemble that remark,鈥� he adds. Self-deprecating humor is often a good idea for politicians, who can come across as self-important. Inside the Beltway, Cruz certainly has that image.
But in this day and age, with reality TV star Donald Trump leading the Republican field, show-biz skills are increasingly a requirement for presidential candidates. Voters want to be entertained. Or at least they want a little levity mixed in with all the gloom and doom some are peddling about the future of the country.
