Proms and princesses: The Disney generation grows up
What do little girls in princess dresses and teenagers at proms have in common? More than you might think!
Last week, a new survey found that nationwide, U.S. teens and their families will spend an average of $1,000 on this year鈥檚 prom. In my region, the northeast, the average is double that鈥揳 whopping $2,000 per family. With such numbers, the article argues, 鈥淧rom is the new wedding.鈥�
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Why is lavish spending on proms on the rise? USA Today reports:
Teen girls view prom as their 鈥渞ed-carpet moment鈥� and are 鈥渉eavily influenced鈥� by celebrities who walk actual red carpets in designer gowns. 鈥淚t鈥檚 a rite of passage, and there鈥檚 a legacy of how you look at your prom. Girls want to dress to impress.鈥�
In other words, the intense consumerism of prom may be fueled by a wish to be like a celebrity for a night: the center of attention, all eyes on her, enjoying the spotlight.
But with such pleasures come intense pressure鈥搕he pressure of public scrutiny, with a fear of condemnation if the girl fails to achieve an idealized look. External scrutiny may be real or imagined. It may take place on Facebook or at an afterparty. But self-scrutiny will most likely take place in the mirror, as a girl turns her critical eye on her own reflection to gauge whether she measures up to the ideal. No sympathy, no compassion鈥搄ust judgments.
It鈥檚 easy for critics to wag their fingers at teen girls and their parents for enabling this behavior. However, prom spending can鈥檛 be removed from its cultural context. For one thing, girls face a marketing machine that makes such spending seem necessary聽(see any teen magazine during prom season for details). But more importantly, our culture socializes girls to be consumers who treat themselves as commodities鈥損ackaged to be gazed upon, admired, and desired.
Consider all the toddler girls who want nothing more than to be 聽miniature Disney Princesses: Some are so insistent on their princess identities that they will wear nothing but princess play clothes, and protest with tearful heartbreak at every well-intended reality check. For the families of discerning young preschool consumers, this can become a costly interest to support: Disney-branded princess dresses start at about $45 at the Disney Store; accessories like matching shoes, tiaras, and purses are sold separately.
The Disney princess dresses can cost twice that or more if purchased at a Disney theme park during a family vacation, while a full princess makeover at Disney鈥檚 popular Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique can set parents back an additional $50-$190 or more (dress not included). But Disney persuades parents that these costs are worthwhile, for the memories will last a lifetime: As the signs at Disney鈥檚 parks say, 鈥淟et the memories begin.鈥�
And so the toddler girl鈥檚 $100-$200 princess dress-up experience sets the stage for the $1,000-$2,000 prom.
What the toddlers and teens are buying is a fantasy. Teen girls who aspire to have a 鈥渞ed-carpet moment鈥� at prom鈥搇ike couples who now spend an average of $27,000 on their dream weddings鈥揳re spending their money to display a glamorous image for a single evening.
The marketing machine insists that moment will 鈥渓ast a lifetime,鈥� which makes all the spending seem worthwhile. The advertising narrative tells girls, 鈥淵ou鈥檙e worth it! Go ahead and be glamorous. Show everyone the real you.鈥�
But this prom experience isn鈥檛 so much 鈥渞eal鈥� as aspirational.
Just like little girls (and beautiful brides) are not really princesses, girls at prom are playing dress-up, too. Yes, it鈥檚 a lot of fun to do so鈥揵ut as many girls do in fact know, prom can be just as fun on a smaller budget. (As one teen who reported happily finding a gown on consignment said last year, 鈥淏eing frugal is cool.鈥�) When exorbitant spending seems necessary and inevitable, though, the marketers are winning鈥揳ided and abetted by a culture that teaches girls that a primary source of their value is their appearances.
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