海角大神

Not too long ago, I read an article in an issue of聽Bon Appetit聽about Mimi Thorisson, who publishes a blog called聽. The magazine article included quite a few wonderful photographs of Mimi and her family preparing for and hosting a dinner party. (Here鈥檚聽of that article.)

It looked fabulous. In fact, it made most of my dinner parties look pretty awful.

贵谤补苍办濒测,听I wished I could host a dinner party like the one Mimi was hosting in the magazine, and I honestly doubted whether I could really pull it off.

Along with the article was, of course, a guide to making at least some of the elements work. The article suggested buying candles (with nice candlesticks) to aid with the lighting, 鈥渙verdo鈥� the flowers, serve the best possible wine and bread, and so on.

In other words,聽most of the suggestions involved spending money or spending absurd amounts of time.

Those are the easy answers. They鈥檙e not really the key to having this kind of beautiful dinner party.

There鈥檚 also another element going on here 鈥� and it鈥檚 something that I鈥檓 even guilty of myself sometimes on The Simple Dollar.聽The photos and the specific stories from the article are carefully selected to create an amazing picture, and there鈥檚 a ton of work going on (and a ton of failures) that you don鈥檛 see.

What you do see is gorgeous scenes. What you don鈥檛 see is that 99 out of 100 of the photos didn鈥檛 turn out so well.

What you do see is an amazing dinner on the table. What you didn鈥檛 see is Mimi or her husband accidentally dropping a loaf of bread or a side dish in the kitchen, ruining it.

What you do see is perfect lighting. What you don鈥檛 see is the light poles off to the side that amp up the lighting.

What you do see is beautiful people. What you don鈥檛 see is the聽video and photo editing聽that goes on behind the scenes to make them shine.

What you do see is an amazing dinner party. What you don鈥檛 see is that most of their meals are ordinary meals around the kitchen table.

All of this is on top of the work that Mimi and her family put into that dinner party.聽There was unquestionably a lot of thought and effort and preparation that went into that setup.

Whenever you see a video or an article or an ad or a television show that depicts a 鈥渓ifestyle鈥� that you wish that you had, keep those things in mind.聽It鈥檚 made to look wonderful, but聽it鈥檚 not products that make that magic.聽Usually, it鈥檚 a ton of setup work. It鈥檚 lighting. It鈥檚 often people that look better than average and are made up and digitally edited to look even better. It鈥檚 also a聽ton聽of additional planning and preparation.

Whenever you see such a thing, don鈥檛 respond by feeling bad about yourself, because that often leads to looking for a way to 鈥渞ebound鈥� from that feeling, often with a purchase. Respond instead by being impressed with the hard work of the people who made that image or that article.

That鈥檚 because, in the end,聽hard work is the key to making anything amazing.聽It鈥檚 not products. It鈥檚 not throwing money around. It鈥檚 about taking a hundred pictures to get that perfect image. It鈥檚 about spending several hours to make that perfect dish. It鈥檚 about carefully planning and taking care of the little details.

You can鈥檛 spend money to get these things 鈥� at least, not in any realistic or consistent way. You can only spend time and passion.

A product won鈥檛 make you have the life you dream about. Hard work and preparation are the paths to success.

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