海角大神

A 鈥渨ildly successful鈥� businessman takes a woman out to lunch. He鈥檚 become one of the Forbes 400 鈥� the richest people in the United States. And in all other ways this man is living what most people would consider to be an extremely privileged life.

As they travel together in the back seat of a limo, the woman 鈥� a friend of author and journalist Janice Kaplan 鈥� congratulates the man for his success by showing him his name on the Forbes list. But instead of enjoying the moment, he 鈥渆xploded in indignation when he noticed one of his competitors listed twenty places ahead of him.鈥�

Ms. Kaplan鈥檚 suggestion: 鈥淸N]ever compare 鈥� just appreciate what you have.鈥�

Indeed.

The Gratitude Diaries is filled with practical wisdom gained from Kaplan鈥檚 own efforts to be more grateful and from interviews on the subject of gratitude with psychologists, academics, friends, and other thoughtful people 鈥� even several movie stars. And it testifies to the good that redounds. 聽

Kaplan鈥檚 resolution to be grateful was made in the wake of going to a dismal New Year鈥檚 Eve party where she listened to another woman grouse.

Realizing that she herself had much to be grateful for 鈥� but often wasn鈥檛 鈥� she resolved to 鈥渟pend the coming year seeing the sunshine instead of the clouds.鈥�

She decided to 鈥渇ind one area to focus on each month 鈥� whether husband, family, friends, or work 鈥� and become my own social scientist. I wanted to see what happened when I developed an attitude of gratitude.鈥� She also began a gratitude journal in which she writes every night.

It鈥檚 no news flash that being grateful is better than being grumpy 鈥� it鈥檚 undoubtedly good for you and everyone around you. But Kaplan takes this theme and in lively, vigorous prose thoroughly demonstrates the greatness of gratitude. And readers may come away from Kaplan鈥檚 book feeling that gratitude can be invigorating and joy-inducing just to read about.

Kaplan starts off by expressing more gratitude in her marriage, and moves on from there to her adult children, money matters, and 鈥渂ad times.鈥� One month she creates her own 鈥渘o-complaining zone.鈥� She even applies gratitude to weight loss.

In the marriage chapter, Kaplan comments: 鈥淲hen you expect everything, it鈥檚 hard to be grateful for anything. So I decided that now was the time to put aside impossible expectations and start appreciating [my] husband.鈥�

Kaplan points out, 鈥淲e get used to something 鈥� whether a husband, a house, or a shiny new car 鈥� and then forget why it seemed so special in the first place.鈥� So Kaplan took a step back and started recognizing all over again what a fine man her husband is. Moreover, she started expressing to him this reawakened appreciation. The result: 鈥淸T]he warm feelings between us [became] stronger than ever.... [G]ratitude was making us both a lot happier.鈥�

Kaplan, in this chapter and elsewhere, cites studies that suggest gratitude causes positive physiological and neurological changes 鈥� an idea some readers may find reductive. However, Kaplan mostly shares higher wisdom. Like this, from her 鈥淢aking Bad Times Better鈥� chapter: 鈥淚f you can change something that鈥檚 making you unhappy, go ahead and change it. But if it鈥檚 done, gone, or inevitable, what greater gift can you give yourself than gratitude for whatever life did bring?鈥�

In Kaplan鈥檚 own case, life has brought a dynamic career and a loving family. In addition to being the author, or coauthor, of 12 other books 鈥� 10 are novels 鈥� including two New York Times bestsellers, she was editor in chief of Parade magazine for several years. As a journalist, she鈥檚 done landmark people profiles, and she鈥檚 been a TV producer. Clearly, she brings to her 鈥測ear of living gratefully鈥� considerable life wisdom.

Kaplan finishes her compelling and convincing book about gratitude with a chapter that includes the story of her heartfelt reconciliation with her sister, a development that left both women 鈥渁ppreciating the good in the moment rather than fussing about the past.鈥� Thus begins a 鈥渘ew friendship.鈥�

Gratitude, Kaplan concludes, 鈥渓odged deeper and deeper into my heart and soul.... Gratitude affected how I looked at every event that happened. Being positive and looking for the good had become second nature 鈥� and that made me much happier.鈥�

Kaplan鈥檚 book militates against a world attitude that can seem absorbed in disagreements and strife and preoccupied with unhappiness about the past, the future, and the present. The counterbalancing view expressed so persuasively in 鈥淭he Gratitude Diaries鈥� is in itself cause for gratitude.

David Hugh Smith is a writer living in Brookline, Mass.